Self-love is an important aspect to your wellbeing. It impact how you view yourself, the decision you make and your relationship with others. You may have grownup in an undesirable situation, and these circumstances can make loving yourself extremely difficult.

Self-love is a serious and sensitive subject. Our posts are for informative purpose only and there’s no intention to service as professional help. If you feel you are struggling, please seek professional help.

1. You hide your true self from others

You change around others and hide certain personalities. This process as known as “masking”. You are afraid to be judged by others and adjust yourself to make-up for it.

2. You overanalyze your own behaviour

Lack of self-love leads you to overanalyze your behaviour and create a mask. You study the people around you so you can properly mimic them. This become problematic when you hyper analyze yourself and changing yourself to become someone else.

3. You have a strong fear of being judged by others

Are always worry about what others think of you? Do you think others are closely observing on what you doing and what you wearing to the point that makes you feel hard to go out in public. These feelings are usually highly irrational and maybe impact your relationship with others.

4. You struggle with your physical & mental self-care

Do you find you are not training your body and your mind as much as you should? Are you skipping meals or overeating? Do you use alcohol or other substances to cope with your feelings? If so, you are taking enough time for yourself and neglecting to building your own happiness.

5. You feel inferior to others

It could be you are insecure about your personality, intelligence or your parents. These insecurities combined with a hyperawareness of others in comparison leaves you harshly judge yourself and try to mask who you are.

6. You are too hard on yourself

You focus on your failure and always think you are not doing enough. It’s like in a constant uphill battle to achieve more without taking a moment to appreciate what you’ve done. You never feel satisfied with what you have.

7. You lack confidence

You struggle to feel your opinions and voice matters? Lack of confidence can leads you to discredit your ideas and keep quiet instead of speaking up. Similar to feel inferior, you feel it’s better not to offer any input out of fear of been rejected.

8. You need excessive affirmation & attention

You need excessive affirmation to make sure you are doing ok, you might have a hard time accepting who you are. This put an extremely drain on relationships. It could emotionally toxic for you and the people around you.

9. You have difficult & unstable relationships

If you lack of self-love, you might have some unique problems in relationships, such as you feel you such others out of your life over the fear of rejection. Or you feel you are the inferior partner in your relationship and you need constant validation. You think your partner is too good for you, and this create an unhealthy dynamic.

10. You settle for less

You settle for less of what you can achieve. Did you give up on your dream and settle for something complete different? This maybe due to your fear of failure or you don’t think you have what it takes and set yourself short to achieve what you truly want.


Self-love is truly important. Life is tough with many ups and downs. It’s important to know things can improve. If you are struggling, it always help to reach out to someone you trust and talk. Or reach out to the right mental health professional and take baby steps to create a better life.